I may not be at re-rigging, I have an exam

This member of our team is proud to be able to touch her tongue to her nose. However, it may be difficult to acquire a demonstration of this talent owing to the fact that she is part of the infamous crew which was received the ‘disappearing act’ award. As part of the questionnaire which was sent around to all of us going down to Georgia in order to gain some useful information for each person’s biography; she responded in a similar fashion to the majority of the team – with a “Land Before Time” reference.  Anyway, her favorite dinosaur is Petrie the Pteranodon. She claims that she ‘may or may not’ be the subject of a tragically hip song, the operative words in that sentence being ‘may or may not’. Unlike most others for this trip, who responded to the question ‘what are you most looking forward to’ with something to do with, food, American stereotypes or Honey Boo Boo, she is most excited to be able to row and then not worry about falling asleep in class later. This is something that wouldn’t be a problem if we decided to practice at a ‘normal’ time, hint hint coaches. Some say that if she was mayor, she would have called something better than transit busses to transport her football team, and that she recently launched her own line of designer Tupperware. All I know is, her name is Alex Stefanovski

All I Want is Braveheart and a Beer

Two score and four years ago, this waffle loving, wake making, Western attending, wacky, fun loving guy was born. He professes his ideal evening to be spent doing nothing but petting a pot-bellied pig named Hamlet. However, those of us who know him well enough to be his facebook friends would probably agree that he also enjoys a good screening of Braveheart while drinking beer. Seriously, I’ve seen this same status something like 3 times in the last couple months. His favorite dinosaur is the Ankylosaurus, I don’t really have a joke for that one; but at least you learned something from reading this post right?  Preferring not to brag about his personal athletic achievements, he responded to the question “most notable athletic achievement” with ‘I think I went to the gym yesterday’. On the other hand, I do happen to know that he plays a mean game of beer pong and has an aptitude for chugging Guinness. He has been referred to as a real Mario Andretti behind the wheel of a car. Some say that he thought Star Wars was a documentary, and that he likes his athletes to take their oars down to the dock 6 hours before the race. All I know is, he’s coach Matt Waddell.